Buster Blankenship Has Some Things To Say And He Is Very Sorry In Advance

Okay! OKAY! There is one of them -- just the one, fine, I can count -- who decided to climb up on their very tall soapbox and talk about Buster Blankenship like Buster Blankenship was not going to HEAR about it! Well! I heard about it! Momma's best boy has EARS!

You stood up there in front of everybody here at 80s Championship Wrestling and you said I sound like a teenager who was told to clean his room! Sir! My room is IMMACULATE! I have a 1:72 scale Spitfire on the windowsill that I painted myself, every rivet, and I would like to see YOU try that with your big clumsy fingers, I would absolutely like to see it! You said I should stop calling my mother for reassurance -- and I want you to know that stung, it genuinely stung, and I am not going to apologize for saying so -- well, maybe a little -- sorry -- sorry for sorry -- ANYWAY!

You brought up YOUR mother! You said she taught you better than to speak ill of people! And then you spoke ill of me for six whole paragraphs! Buster noticed that! Buster is writing that down!

You want to talk about what happens between the ropes -- between the ROPES, he says, very confident, very calm, like the squared place is not the loudest most terrifying room on earth -- fine! Fine! Buster Blankenship will meet you there and I have been doing deep breathing exercises and I charted the entire night sky last Tuesday and I am READY, I think, I am mostly ready, Momma please do not watch this part.

Champions do not need a hug, you said. Well. I need several, actually. But I can wait until after I make you regret every single syllable of that sentence.